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He’s always on my mind. From the time i wake up ’till i close my eyes, he’s everywhere I go. He’s all I know… I know this sounds crazy but this song has always been repeating and repeating in my mind for eternity- my current last song syndrome (whatever!). 

I don’t know what’s happening to me. I can barely understand anything because I’m always thinking of someone else from time to time- from day ’till midnight. Though this “latest” insanity is tiring me a little- it just feels so right because it somehow gives me a cheerful perspective of just about everything else. It gives me the feeling that I haven’t felt in a long time. It is something wonderful that has brought me back to life.

 Each thought of tomorrow brings an unexplainable excitement that makes it hard for me to sleep through the night. And when daylight breaks through the darkness, a curl on my lips welcomes the start of the day with my thoughts on him- again. 

His every smile and every glance make my heart smile in silence and though I badly wanted to share how much happiness I feel inside- I can’t because I don’t want to lose this solitary happiness that only I, and no one else in the world can fathom. A mystery that only I can answer. 

Emotions are quite deceiving. I’ve learned my lesson well and I’ll never repeat the same mistake I’ve done before- never again. I know this feeling of mine is ephemeral. It is short-lived, it is never long-lasting. I never believe that true love exists in my age because for me true love takes a lot of time to grow and develop. It doesn’t just come in a moment but rather it comes the other way around. I’m only experiencing an exagerrated infatuation which is normal for teenagers like me- that’s all. I’m just exploring my emotions and I know that I’m safe because I’m not taking this seriously and I’m not showing him what I feel. Two months to go and we’ll part our ways through our different destinations in life and for sure it would take years for us to see each other again, but a lot of changes can happen in a lapse of time that long. As of now I treat him as my source of inspiration to get better each passing day. A vibrant ray of sunlight to brighten me up ’till the last days that we can possibly see each other.

I’m only here to enjoy the few remaining moments of my high school life and I won’t let anyone or even myself destroy it by spilling precious secrets that I would surely regret that can ruin my life for good.

Only heaven knows how much I care about him. Though he doesn’t care for me in the same way that I do- I don’t mind because I’m not asking anything from him in return. This precious little secret would be kept on the very depths of my heart forever and will be cherished as long as I live. I’m just waiting in  silence of what’s to come through the last remaining days of march.